Unbeaten Solitude

I ran. I ran amidst the black-hearted, egregiously demonic wood. All I could feel was the vicious smell of the cacodemons approaching me. I held my breath and I ran. I ran faster, I ran harder. I had to save us. The limpid beats of Pari's heart and mine became louder to my senses. The stories of the woods my mother told me when I was a little girl always had given me goosebumps. But who knew these dastard woods will be my only refuge today!

Pari was awake from the shock I gave her tonight. She looked at me and started crying. But I didn't stop. This is the first time Pari's tears didn't make me worried, didn't make my heart wrench. But I was afraid, afraid to lose her. Her cry made me irked and angry. It scared the hell out of me.

I angrily said, whispering to her - Shut up, Pari. Just stop crying!

But Pari, a girl who was totally like her mother, stick intent to her decision of crying and making me even more impatient. I could see through almost every qualities that she has acquired from me. The restlessness which I still possess, the beautiful little face which exactly resemble mine, the curly hair - not an inch different from my long hair. She soothed me, her tears made me more desperate. Her pretty little face made me determined about my decision, about the drastic attempt I have taken tonight. I felt at ease. She wasn't a bit like her father. No, she wasn't! 

My raging heart could never leave her alone with her father. I was restless every moment when she was with him, while I lay alone in this cruel dark world. 

I would tell the world, I would tell the court that she is the only thing I have. I love her like no one does. Her father cannot love her the same. Her father doesn't have a heart. 

I stopped in the dark looking all around. All I could see was darkness. It was a pitch-black world I live in. I know I cannot give her the lavish life she led at her father's, I cannot render her expensive birthday parties and gifts like her father did, I can never buy her a dress like the one she's wearing right now. I know I can't. But I know I can give her my life, my love, and myself which was enough for her to be with me. I am her mother, I have carried her within myself for nine long months and this was a reason enough for the world to leave the two of us alone. The law, the courts, the judges, her father and his wife cannot snatch her from me. She is mine from breakfast to dinner.

              The only survivor of our relationship was Pari. We were constantly fighting over her, I wanted to take her with me, the only one I had. But Raman wasn't in a mood to leave her either. What else did he want when he had his beautiful Priya with him, I never understood!
        What happened to those days when he made a thousand promises to me, he knelt down and proposed me to get married to him and gave me a wonderful ring at our marriage? I was happy then, we were a very cute couple. Pari came in our lives two and a half years after our marriage. She made us complete.



Our kins had just left the hospital when Raman whispered into my ears - I have another angel in my life! Thank you, love.


The pain of the stitches on my belly, the exhaustion from giving birth, vanished all of a sudden like a puff, when he said those words. I blush every time I remember those words. I was excited to lead a happy life together. I dreamt of holding Pari's hands together and make her walk, tell her bed-time stories and then kiss her goodnight together but Priya came in between us. She has playfully snatched away my husband from me and destroyed our family and my life!

                The marriage, the promises, our thousand nights didn't matter anymore to Raman. I didn't matter anymore to him. All matters to him now, is Priya. And Priya is with him. Then why, why is he trying to snatch Pari away from me?!

I thought not the whole world was this cruel but they broke my imaginations in air when the court announced Pari would stay with her father after our divorce! I died a thousand deaths the moment it was announced. They couldn't see the love a mother has for her baby, all they could see was Raman's money, his big house, his luxurious cars and his charm with which he fooled even me! I saw Raman and Priya smiling wide the moment they heard the judgement. Raman looked at me and expressed his long depressed feeling through his crooked gestures-- I told you, I would win! 




        



              Pari finally stopped crying as I silently sang lullabies to her. Aah!! I know she must have craved for them each night while her father and Priya lay beside each other in some other room. I so missed her.! Pari closed her eyes and went into her dreams. I kissed on her cheek. Yeah, I kissed her nearly after 8 months. My hands began to tremble as I held her in the dark, cold wood. I only had one shawl which I perfectly arranged for Pari to sleep. I sat beside her in the dark, trembling as the cool breeze blew above us. But it didn't bother me anymore. I smiled my victorious smile! I am a kidnapper. Yes, just like the one which my mother had described to me when I was like Pari. I did just like what my mother had once told me; I went into Raman's big bungalow, killed the gatekeeper whom once I used to call Ravi-kaka, entered Pari's big room from the window, saw Priya there, killed her when she shouted on seeing me and then took Pari in my ever waiting hands and ran.


The world would now call me a murderer but I simply don't care. I have my Pari with me. I wouldn't have to kill them if Raman would have let me stay with her. He snatched her away from me, I snatched away his happiness.I looked at Pari's beautiful face and again smiled my victorious smile - I told you, Raman.I would win!