The Roaring Fella!

When I came across a picture post saying -- Did you know? When you dream about someone it means they want to talk to you or contact you, it really started giving me goosebumps! Well, for the last few years, the dreams that catch me at most nights are encircled with at least half a dozen of tigers and lions!

The post almost left me with a nervous breakdown. It doesn't have to be them, right?! I hastily logged out from Facebook. The thought of the colossal beasts talking to me or at least coming near me makes me collapse on the floor.

Speaking of the deadly dreams, let me tell you, I have many times clicked on the Google Search button after typing "Dreaming of tigers and lions" above it. Yes, the dreams irked me like anything and left me break out in a sweat each time I had them. A single picture of them in a newspaper or somewhere else makes me imagine a hell lot out of it.

                              There's always half a dozen of them at least circling around me, roaring loud while looking at me like they have got hold of me and are now going to tear me apart!! Man, trust me, it is scary! Well, but I still manage to run away each time they come near me and hide myself somewhere! And would I ever in my life want them to talk to me, err, I mean roar at me again?!! Each time I see the picture of the roaring hero in front of my eyes, it makes me feel like I am a piece of a chicken hanging and waiting for the heroes to come and take their turn at me one after another. It makes me feel so sorry for the chicken which was so helpless when I plunged myself into it without a second thought. I am nothing but that powerless, feeble chicken flapping its wings when the butcher holds it to get it slaughtered. The King of the Jungle waits for me while his ladies look at me wickedly flashing all their mammoth yellow teeth and I try to escape their gape!

And as I stood stiff and waited for the dudes to come near me, the chicken inside me, started jumping in triumph. Never in its life, it had been so so happy; finally it is seeing the justice in the vengeance; it will see me getting killed just the same way I had killed it!


I started calling the names of Gods I have ever known in my life, but they all seemed to be laughing at me! The gigantic guy approached towards me like I was a diamond! Man, it hurt!

Am I paying for being a non-vegetarian?! Of course not! There are millions who eat chicken in this world, am not the only one!! All I could do then was to run and run! I started running. Don't look back and don't stop, just run!




The unclouded pictures of my mom and dad wailing and sobbing at the news of me getting torn apart by a tiger, my friends giving the one minute silent mourn for my death, my foes jumping in joy after getting the stingy news -- all came flashing to me one after another! I am going to die, but not a normal death, I am going to get torn apart by the dude who is running behind me!! I started feeling dizzy. But no, I have to run! That's the only thing I can do right now, right before I die! I have to die a hero's death and the heroic deed I can do right now is to run!
Just before I was going to faint I found a big house to hide myself in. Thank god, I mean really, I thanked God! May be there's a wee little chance for me to live, may be I can see my parents again! I hid myself there, the dudes kept waiting for me to come out, they kept on guarding the house, like as if I wanted them to!

I opened my eyes to realize that I was perspiring. I got my senses back and thank God again that it was just a dream!  It was still night and our house was dark. I could hardly see a thing but yeah, I was kinda sure of the dude standing outside my house and waiting for me!

It gave a chilly feeling within my throat. But hey come on, how can a tiger come in a city?! The dreams aren't real and I must stop being so petrified!



I turned around, got into the blanket and closed my eyes-- let's sleep calmly until again I get to meet the roaring fellow in my next dream!!

The Fish Tale!!

I was being build-up and ready to put up with myself and the city of joy, Kolkata by the Dudes and their pretty partners up there. They anticipated my whole digestive system to be a true Bong and waited long for whole 9 months for me to see this city! My veins inside my truly built Bong belly ran with zest once they relished the mind-boggling taste of the "fish" and "rice"!! I was pretty much sure that I have been successful in making Them proud of me. I was here standing up to much of their expectations on which I hold clinging to, just like a faithful pet, through out my life.


I so loved being a perfect Bong. The one look at the "phish" in the road-side bazaars while I am on my way to my college, makes my tongue and heart plunge up high in the air and while I return again on that same way, my "I-could-not-stop-myself" urge to get down from the bus or auto and buy some "phishes" to my home! But I finally stop my salivating pink tongue and my pounding heart which mournfully resides slowly inside my body!! The rib cages remind my corybantic heart that it cannot ever come out from my body breaking them apart. As the bus goes surpassing the bazaars and finally gets on to the main road, my dejected heart starts to get back its previous slow paces. But the "nothing lasts forever" phrase finds its golden space inside my desperate little muscular piece in between my ribcages,which remains busy pumping my blood as always. I say, stop beta, the dinner is not that far! And mom, surely will never serve it without the fish!! 


And there, my heart smiles again! :)


Being a foodie, is the most tragic episode that can happen in a woman's life, ever! Which to choose first??

The food, the fish, or the figure?!! These F's can really be that dangerous in a woman's life!

But what does the world do when they see a woman eating all that she loves without a worry about her figure?! It's a hell of a crime, really?!! The President, the Prime Minister and all others plan to take out a new law against this, keeping the rape cases aside!


The Law-- If you are a woman, you can never eat french fries, rice and all those fatty itchy stuffs! If you do, you must stay single for your entire life and no guys will ever look at you! You must be humiliated in front of all your slim, sexy friends who all have their own handsome boyfriends and husbands loving them and craving for their bodies!





Aaaahhhh!!!! The moment I was going to put the lovely smiling french fries and the rice , looking straight into my eyes and seducing me, into my salivating mouth, the Law somehow disturbed me! The saliva shifted from my very tongue to my eyes and heart!! I pulled myself away from the table of wonderful stuffs, my eyes jealous to see the guys of my family laughing viciously at me and then at the french fries and the rice which were placed proudly on the table by my mom! I looked like a loser!! I ran out of the room only to wait for them to have their dinner and then slowly creep inside and take a handful of rice and the french fries which my mommy will be surely keeping aside for me and my little heart!

But I'm a woman now and I must stop dreaming about these stuffs to have a perfect figure! But being a Bengali woman, I have finally made an advantage out of it. Unlike the vegetarian ladies, I can still be alive with the "phishes" of our Bengal.



My tongue salivating and my heart plunging , each time I see a fish and my mum screaming at me-- Tomake ami ekta vegetarian barite biye debo, dehko!! (I will marry you off to a house of vegetarians, you see!!)

And there, again breaking my heart with these words!!